1.3 In a Fog

Time seemed to speed up as Danisha sat there.  Eventually she distantly heard sirens and then suddenly her apartment was filled with people.  She'd never called the cops, but she had left the door to the apartment open so someone else must have.  Someone tried asking her questions, but she couldn't bring herself to speak.  Someone else came up to her and confirmed what she already knew, that her husband was dead.  They also mentioned that their new stereo had been stolen but Danisha couldn't have cared less about that.

It wasn't until she stood in the graveyard and the hired minister had stopped speaking that the speed of time seemed to return to normal.  Nielson was gone.  Now buried six feet under the earth.

Initially she felt like she was in a fog.  The pain felt so far away.  But as the funeral guests slowly began to leave and the last of the dirt was patted into place the overwhelming grief was finally able to rise up and consume her.  She began to sob openly.  And no one around her cared, because none of them actually knew her or her husband.  She was now completely and utterly alone.

The bright lights in the city beyond the graveyard seemed to torment her.  Why had she brought them to this horrible place?  If only she hadn't been so selfish.  Nielson certainly hadn't wanted to come here, not that she really knew why.  And now she'd never know.  Because he was dead.

"I should have listened to you.  This is all my fault," she cried, burying her face in her hands.

She couldn't bear being there any longer and was about to turn and leave when she felt someone's presence standing behind her.  She instantly tensed with fear.  Who was this man?  She didn't know him.  And the fear of this city that had so brutally taken her husband from her rose up inside of her.  What if this was the murderer, come to finish the job...?

The rain began to fall as she slowly turned to face the stranger.  "Mrs. Gaul?" he prompted, looking at her with sympathy.  "My name is Romeo Rake.  I'm so sorry for your loss," he commented.  He certainly didn't seem like a murderer and Danisha was able to calm down a little.

"Thank you for your sympathies," she said heavily, and was about to turn to go when he stopped her.

"Mrs. Gaul, I'm the head of the police investigative unit," he explained, suddenly catching her attention.

"The police?  Have you found the person who murdered my husband?" Danisha demanded, feeling a slight twinge of hope amidst the sea of despair.

"I'm afraid not, ma'am.  There isn't a lot to go on.  There was no forced entry or any fingerprints that we can identify," he explained with a sigh and a helpless shrug.  "I was actually hoping you might have some more information for me," he admitted.

"How the hell should I know?!  You're the police.  You're supposed to figure this stuff out.  You can't let my husband's murderer go unpunished!" she cried, bordering on hysterics.

"Listen, I understand your pain.  Really I do.  But we're not miracle workers.  There's only so much we can do with the limitations we have.  Not only that, but we're really short-handed right now.  I promise you we're doing as much as we can," Romeo insisted, throwing his hands up in helplessness.

"Well it clearly isn't good enough," Danisha mumbled.

"If you feel that strongly about it, why don't you come and help out?  If you join the police force you could directly help us catch this person," Romeo suggested.

"Oh yes.  Oh, that's brilliant," Danisha replied with a harsh laugh.  "Could you really see me as a police officer?  I can barely lift five pounds and you want me on the streets going after bad guys.  Are you looney?  No wonder you can't catch the guy!"

"Scoff all you want," Romeo replied, shrugging off her criticism.  "Here's a book that we give all our new recruits.  It might help you see what it is we really do.  And there's more to the police force than just chasing bad guys.  You seem like a really smart girl.  We could use someone like you in our forensics department.  And maybe you could find the clues we missed that could help us identify not just your husband's murderer, but all the other criminals out there who get away with their crimes," he suggested, handing her the book.  Danisha wanted to push it away, but the other man wouldn't let her.  "It's totally up to you.  But at least think about it," he insisted, forcing Danisha to look into his eyes.

She nodded slowly, once.  That seemed to satisfy him and he left.  He was the last of the funeral guests to leave which left her finally alone.  Part of her wanted to stay by Nielson.  Stay by him all night.  But the rain was getting worse.  It was cold.  She was exhausted and feeling nauseous.  Not surprising, given everything she'd been to.  So she slowly made her way home.

As she made her way home the fog of depression settled over her again.  She couldn't stop the tears that flowed down her face, but neither could she really muster up any other emotion.

She'd been staying at a hotel while the investigation had been going on, but it had long since finished.  The police force had offered to continue paying for her hotel room, but Danisha just wanted to go home, no matter how many painful memories home might have.

She was dimly aware of the fact that they'd managed to clean all of the blood off the wall and appeared to have gone so far as to replace the carpet, but she didn't spend any time in that room.  Instead she went straight to the bedroom.  She would have thought, with how exhausted she felt, she would have fallen asleep right away but she just couldn't get settled.  And the nausea stirring her gut probably didn't help.  So instead she opened up the book Romeo had given her and settled in to read until she dozed off.

The man's offer had probably just been to make her feel better and she'd had no intention of taking it seriously... but as she started to read the book she felt herself getting sucked in.

She ended up not getting any sleep that night, but had made up her mind by that morning.  She immediately got up and marched herself over to the hospital, intent on getting a physical for the police force.  Maybe she would be terrible at it, but at least she would be doing something.

The nurse took her vitals and made her pee in a cup and all of that other wonderful stuff, then had her sit in a chair to wait for the doctor to arrive.

Finally the man came in and took a seat across from Danisha.  He looked at her with sympathy.  Perhaps it was because she was still crying silently, but bitterly she couldn't help but wonder if everyone had heard the news.  It had made it into the paper.  Although she would have thought murder would be fairly commonplace in a city like this.  Just one more reason they never should have come here.

"Mrs. Gaul, before we begin there's something we need to discuss," the doctor began, looking at her gently.  "Are you aware that you're pregnant?" the doctor asked.

Danisha was stilling herself for something, anything, but not this.  She stared at the doctor for a long moment before choking out the one word "Pregnant?!"

"I thought you might not be aware," the doctor replied solemnly.  "Yes, you're still early on but we're one hundred percent certain," he confirmed.

"I... I see.  But I didn't come here about that," Danisha replied, her mind not really processing this new information.  "I want to join the police force," she explained.  To be honest, she couldn't deal with the idea that she was pregnant at the moment.  Not now.  Perhaps when the fog had lifted a bit she could deal with it appropriately... but...

"There is no way I can give you clearance to join the police force while you're pregnant.  The physical strain would be too much for you.  I understand you've been through quite a lot recently.  I'm going to prescribe you some vitamins and something to help you rest and I suggest that you put aside such thoughts until after you have the baby," the doctor replied firmly.

"You don't understand!  I have to do this now!  I can't wait!  The longer I wait..." Danisha began to protest but the doctor's frown only hardened.

"No.  I would be in violation of my oath as a doctor if I let you.  I suggest you go home and get some rest Mrs. Gaul.  Think of the baby," he insisted.

She didn't want to think of the baby.  She wanted to think of her husband.  What about what he needed.  Justice?  But she knew she wasn't getting anywhere with this man so she angrily thanked him for his help and took the medicine that he prescribed.

However, as she left the hospital she began to feel a bit of light burn away some of the fog.  A baby.  Her baby and Nielson's baby.  Maybe something good had come out of this after all, she thought as she hesitantly placed a hand over her stomach.


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This chapter is mostly set up.  Not nearly as exciting as previous chapters, I'm afraid.  I actually set up the doctor's office really nicely, but you ended up not seeing any of it in this scene XD  Oh well...